Anxiety
Coping & Dealing with Anxiety through Counselling
What makes one person anxious may not create the same response in someone else. Things like breaking up, concern about exams, or a fight with a friend may cause you to feel anxious, worried or scared.
Everyone feels some anxiety at different times during their life.
It becomes a problem if you feel so anxious that it interferes with your normal day-to-day activities. If this occurs it is important that you seek help.
A counsellor or a clinical psychologist and a Doctor are a good place to start if you are looking for help.
What are the symptoms of anxiety?
Anxiety can affect both your physical health and your mental health (behaviour and feelings /emotions). They can depend on a number of factors. They may pass quickly or may stay for a long period of time.
If you, or a friend, have some or many of the following symptoms it may be worth talking to your doctor, a clinical psychologist or a counsellor about ways to reduce anxiety.
Some common ways that anxiety might affect your mental health (behaviour and feelings) include:
- Irritability or constantly being in a bad mood
- Worry or a constant feeling that something bad is about to happen
- Often ask many unnecessary questions and require constant reassurance
- Being very well-behaved, eg never get into trouble at school or with friends (though not necessarily at home)
- Get upset when a mistake is made or if there is a change of routine, eg sports day, a substitute teacher, unexpected visitors, or a trip to an unfamiliar place
- Being a loner, or hanging out with a small group of group of people (who are often younger or older)
- Being a perfectionist, eg taking a long time to complete homework because you try to have it absolutely correct
- Being argumentative (but not usually aggressive), especially when trying to avoid a feared situation
- Being pessimistic and easily able to identify what may go wrong in any given situation
- Not answering questions and rarely volunteering comments or information at school or college
Anxiety & Your Physical Health
Some common ways that anxiety might affect your physical health include:
- Dry mouth and/or difficulty swallowing
- Nightmares
- Difficulty getting to and staying asleep
- Difficulty concentrating
- Muscle tension and headaches
- Rapid heart rate and breathing
- Sweating
- Trembling
- Diarrhea
- Flare-up of another health problem or illness (e.g. dermatitis, asthma)
- Sexual problems, such as not being having any sexual feelings or being interested in sex.

What Can I Do If I Am Feeling Anxious?
Making Changes
Look at the times when you get anxious and the things that cause you stress. Can you identify changes you can make that might help? Are there people that make the situation better or worse?
Are there things that make you feel more relaxed that you can do more of? It is easy to get so caught up in day-to-day life that you don’t take time to think about what is going on in your life and what makes you happy.
Eating & Exercise
When people feel anxious they often neglect themselves. Ensuring that you are eating healthy foods and regular meals as well as getting regular exercise will improve your overall health and well-being.
How Counselling Can Help?
Many women and their partners experience strong feelings of guilt and shame followed by sadness after having an abortion for which post-abortion counselling is hugely beneficial. One of the most common emotions to deal with along with the pain is anger as to why what we did what we did. The anger that presents many years later when dealing with the grief and shame caused by an abortion decision. It can be a stressful time, reinforced by feelings of isolation, if the woman is under pressure to conform to wider expectations without addressing her own needs.
Counselling at the earliest stages can help an individual reach the best-informed choice. A counsellor is non judgemental and able to help where the individual or couple are both involved in making the decision. It may be appropriate for them to attend couple counselling to explore the more complex needs of each and what these might represent.
The couple may also be living silently through the fact that it was years ago and never talk about it but it’s there. Each partner has a different point of view, which can swing and move & it is rarely a simple clear-cut decision. It does effect individuals in many different ways Anger / Isolation / Addictions / Depression and often leading to the ruining of the relationship because these factors are always at the top of the discussion.
If you have been personally affected by abortion, I strongly urge you to take time to explore all the options open to you. Remember that hope, help and healing is possible in every situation no matter how painful or traumatic. Counselling also helps for the fathers and partners involved in the abortion. Contact me using the form provided and I’ll be in touch.
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